Christ-Inspired Love

Follow God's example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person--such a person is an idolater--has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. (Ephesians 5:1-5 NIV)

Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it. Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering. Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. (Hebrews 13:1-4 NIV)

Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. (Ephesians 4:15 NIV)

How about you?  Do you love people as much as Jesus does?

Pure, Loving Actions

Loving words that build people up are important.  They are only half the picture, though.  We must not love just with our words.  We need to love with our actions as well.

Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. (1 John 3:18 NIV)

James expresses this same thought with a little more detail.

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you. Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. (James 1:19-22 NIV)

People can see whether we love them or not.  We may choose words that are loving, but when we do not really love the person, our actions will give us away.  We ignore.  We avoid.  We build cliques.  We do much, much more.  People pick up on our signals and they can tell they are not loved.

Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father. Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity. (1 Timothy 5:1-2 NIV)

There are four Greek words that translate into our English word, “love.”  One of the four Greek words is specifically used to mean romantic or sexual love.  That Greek word (for romantic love) never shows up in the Bible.  That’s because the love God calls us to have for one another has nothing to do with romance.  As Paul wrote to Timothy, we should love people “with absolute purity.”

So, how about you?  Do you love your neighbor as yourself? Does it show in your actions?  Do you love with absolute purity, as a love for a parent, a brother, or a sister?

Speaking in Love

Yesterday, we reminded ourselves that healthy relationships are built on truth.  We must speak words of truth – God’s truth.

Like a maniac shooting flaming arrows of death is one who deceives their neighbor and says, "I was only joking!" Without wood a fire goes out; without a gossip a quarrel dies down. As charcoal to embers and as wood to fire, so is a quarrelsome person for kindling strife. The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to the inmost parts. Like a coating of silver dross on earthenware are fervent lips with an evil heart. Enemies disguise themselves with their lips, but in their hearts they harbor deceit. Though their speech is charming, do not believe them, for seven abominations fill their hearts. Their malice may be concealed by deception, but their wickedness will be exposed in the assembly. Whoever digs a pit will fall into it; if someone rolls a stone, it will roll back on them. A lying tongue hates those it hurts, and a flattering mouth works ruin. (Proverbs 26:18-28 NIV)

Truth may set us free, but God’s truth tells us how to speak truth.

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. (1 Corinthians 13:1 NIV)

Love filters the truth that we share.  Sometimes love tells us to speak up.  Sometimes love tells us to shut up.  Sometimes love tells us to wait.  When we speak the truth in love, our words always build people up into Christ who is the head of the church.  It doesn’t build them up in the sense that it makes them happy all the time.  It builds them up in the sense that it draws them closer to God.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (Ephesians 4:29 NIV)

The word for “benefit” in this passage comes from the Greek word χάρις (charis).  This word may sound familiar to you.  That’s because we’ve discussed it before.  In Scripture, this word is most often translated as “grace.”  It literally means “gift.”  In other words, our words should be a gift (grace) to those who hear them.  I had a friend in Cincinnati who would reminder herself of this by closing her prayers with the following Psalm.

May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. (Psalms 19:14 NIV)

How about you?  Are your words a gift to those who listen?  Do you speak the truth in love?  Do your words build healthy, God-centered relationships?

Speaking The Truth

Relationships with people can be complicated and confusing.  That’s because each person is unique.  We can take cues from other people, but for any specific person the relationship with that person will be unique.  The goal, however, for all relationships is that they will end up as relationships founded on love.  This begins with another foundation: truth.

The righteous will inherit the land and dwell in it forever. The mouths of the righteous utter wisdom, and their tongues speak what is just. The law of their God is in their hearts; their feet do not slip. (Psalms 37:29-31 NIV)

I’ve watched many people hurt one another under the banner of “truth.”  It gets dicey pretty fast.  Truth, as described here, is not simply an accurate reporting of the details of life.  In other words, truth isn’t just about reporting what someone ate, what they read or watched, what they said, or what they did.  While these details may be accurate, truth happens when those details are viewed through the lense of God’s eyes.  Truth is discovered as we look at the world the way God looks at it and then decide to love all people they way God loves them.  When we do, we have discovered truth.

Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God's wrath comes on those who are disobedient. (Ephesians 5:6 NIV)

When I look at the world through God’s eyes, I see the upcoming judgement, the wrath of God, and the way God provides mercy and grace.  I recognize that all of us, each one separately, will give an account for our words and actions.  When all is said and done, we will either receive judgement for our choices or grace through the work of Jesus on the cross.  When I truly love my neighbor, I will want them to understand this picture and choose grace as well.  That’s why my relationship with others must begin with God and truth.

I urge you, brothers and sisters, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teaching you have learned. Keep away from them. For such people are not serving our Lord Christ, but their own appetites. By smooth talk and flattery they deceive the minds of naive people. (Romans 16:17-18 NIV)

Some are short sighted – even in God’s Church.  That’s why God warns the Church in Rome against such people and leaders.  These people are only looking at this life and trying to “get ahead.”  They have lost sight of the truth, so they use people to gain things.  When we see the truth, however, we use things to gain people who will join you in your walk together with God.

Keep reminding God's people of these things. Warn them before God against quarreling about words; it is of no value, and only ruins those who listen. Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly. (2 Timothy 2:14, 16 NIV)

So, how about you?  Where do your relationships start?  Do they begin with your relationship with God?  Do you begin with the foundation of His truth?  Do you speak the truth?

Relationship Builder

Last week, we looked at what it meant to build a relationship with God.  When we do, that relationship builds life because God wants us to have life abundantly.  Jesus told us this was the greatest command – to love God.  Now we pick up with the rest of Jesus’ statement.

And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." (Matthew 22:39-40 NIV)

I remember when I first learned this command.  I found myself asking the same question that Jesus was asked: “Who is my neighbor?”  I wanted to categorize people into groups.  Some I needed to love.  Others, perhaps, I could just like.  Still others I could just ignore or stay away from.  The ones I didn’t like, I was hoping I could just avoid.  Then I started learning more of the picture.

"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. (Matthew 5:43-48 NIV)

Every person is a human being made in the image of God.  Whether we get along or not, God calls me to love each person.  Do they love me?  Great.  Love them back.  Do they just like me?  Ok.  Love them back.  Do they hate me? Hmmm. Love them back.  That can be a pretty indimidating proposition, especially when they hate me.  But, their hate for me doesn’t let me off the hook.

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister. (1 John 4:18-21 NIV)

How about you?  Do you love your neighbor as yourself?  Are you a relationship builder?