Unmarried

There are two reasons for which God designed sex.  The first is procreation (creating children).  The second is pleasure (building intimacy).  Because God created sex powerful and enjoyable as a gift to the husband and wife.  Because it is both powerful and enjoyable, however, God’s design is that it will help bond a husband and wife together – even when they may want to stray from one another.  It is supposed to be powerful, enjoyable, and, many times, bring the couple a gift from God.  The gift isn’t only the joy of sex.  The gift is the child it produces.  When God gives them the child, God wants both parents there to love, raise, and build the child up.  That is why God doesn’t want us to divorce.

Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?" "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate." "Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?" Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery." (Matthew 19:3-9 NIV)

Jesus’ disciples weren’t too happy about his teachings on this subject.  People had problems in their marriages back then just like they do now.  People would get divorced just like they do now as well.  This was an accepted practice.  When Jesus was asked a tough question about marriage and divorce, I’m sure his disciples would have been much happier if he had given a politically acceptable answer.  Maybe he could say that he personally thinks divorce is wrong, but that he doesn’t feel the church should interfere in such affairs.  Instead, Jesus takes a hard line on this.  He says that divorce is wrong, against God’s design, and even causes people to commit the sin of adultery.

The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry." Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others--and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it." (Matthew 19:10-12 NIV)

In case you don’t know what it is, a eunuch is a person who cannot have sex because they don’t have the necessary organs.  Some are born with birth defects that cause it.  Others were made that way.  But, Jesus says here, some choose to live this way for the sake of the kingdom.  In other words, they choose not to get married (which means they are choosing not to have sex) so that they can focus on God’s call in their lives.  This is the calling of the unmarried.  The apostle, Paul, lived this way his whole life.  His ministry spread the Kingdom of God all across the world of his day.

I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. (1 Corinthians 7:7-8 NIV)

Singleness is a great calling from God.  It allows the unmarried to focus on the ministries God has in store for them.

I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs--how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world--how he can please his wife-- and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world--how she can please her husband. I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord. (1 Corinthians 7:32-35 NIV)

How about you?  Are you unmarried?  When unmarried, did you see it as a calling from God?  Do you see it as a gift?  Do you live the single lifestyle in a way that God designed? Can people see it in your life?  In your ministry?